22 December 2010

mother's day IMO

Semalem twitter penuh ama status menye-menye berbau ibu.. ya.. as we know, today is mother’s day..
Dan, karena gwe gak bisa tidur, dan gak tau mau ngapain.. jadilah gwe baca-baca timeline twitter yang boleh dibilang mengharukan :’/
Dan karena orang-orang pada ngetweet somekind like I love you mum dan sejenisnya, so I started mine with..

- i'm not that kind of daughter who can freely say the word,i love you, mum.Just so you know,i thank you, for everything.even for the yell ;)
- my timeline is filled with other's 'i love you mom'.. i wish i had enough bravery to say it directly.. Poor me, my ego is much bigger.
- And for the people who can freely say those 3 words to their mom without feeling awkward, well.. I envy you. Really.
- So great, sekarang gwe jadi menye'' pengen nangis kan? Dah ah, goodnight :) and yaa.. Happy mother's day..

And that’s the truth, gwe bukan tipe anak yang lovable.. bukan anak yang mengelu-elukan orangtuanya.. bukan tipe anak yang super seneng pas denger mobil orangtuanya nyampe depan pagar, trus lari-lari ke pintu dan meluk mereka.. gwe? Jauh banget dari situ. Bukan tipe anak yang tiap ada masalah selalu lari ke orangtuanya, bukan tipe anak yang berani untuk tumpahin air matanya depan orangtua. Rasanya risih. Aneh. Kaku. Hm, awkward. Dan gwe bukan tipe begitu..

Last time I hugged my mom was when……. *forget*
Last time I said to my mom ‘I love you’ was when……. *forget*

Compare to this girl --> emma, gwe jauhhhh banget dari dia..
Dan baca tulisan dia, I think I envy.. for the people who can freely said I love you directly to their mom, really. I envy. I don’t know why, and I don’t want even try. Cause it seems so AWKWARD.

I know it is wrong. I know I should not be that kind of daughter. But how to change?
Tell me how.
May be someday I’ll know how, before it’s too late. Perhaps.
And if that day would never come, just read my blog mom, I’ll tell you here..

Thank you for everything.

Thank you for giving a chance for me to breath and live in this world.

Thank you for even the yell. Thank you for even the blow and the strike.
I once used to hate you, I once used to dislike you. I know it was wrong.

Then I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for being a childish selfish and selfish daughter..
Thank you for the food you serve,

Thank you for every advice you give, *even it seems like a year if you start your, hm.. speech?

And that’s all.. thank you.

I will make you proud of me, some day. Some how. Some what. *pinkypromise*